Thursday, December 09, 2004

Trailer Parks and Tornadoes

So it's raining today. Not just raining, but BIG TIME raining. with lightning, thunder and tornadoes. I hear that there's been tornadoes in Louisiana and Alabamie both.

So tell me.... why are trailers so popular in the south? There are absolutely everywhere here in the south. I go out west and north on occasion and NEVER EVER see any kinds of trailers. What is up with that?

Here's my trailer park philosophy. Poor people and miserable people buy trailers. They buy trailers and move them to places that are prone to tornadoes. Why? Because they are unhappy and smart. I say that they are unhappy because they buy these ugly boxes to live in and move them to locations that will more than likely be annihilated by a tornado. I say the they are smart because, they know that if they get hurt or killed, that someone in their family will inherit money. I know this because I grew up poor.

When I was growing up, it didn't matter if there was a crumb to eat in the entire house and the lights were being turned off for non-payment. My grandmother always made sure to pay her insurance premiums. She didn't just have insurance on herself, but ALL her kids and other random relatives. She also had Accidental Death and Dismemberment (AD&D)

I always thought that she had all those insurance premiums because she was lonely and just wanted to be able to count on the insurance guy to come see her every month and collect them premiums. (Kind of like an escort service, but without the sex!)

But now, I am sure that she did it because she was smart (Very Smart!). Now my grandmother never lived in a trailer, but one of her kids did. (She had a big ole premium on that one.) Now the AD&D came in handy because all my relatives did really risking things, like shooting guns, drinking and driving, and their own auto-repairs (every hear the story of the engine block falling on uncle Roy, and taking his arm off? Was worth $10,000)

But I digress, back to the Trailer Tribes of the South. Have you ever seen a Trailer Park? They trailers are so close together that when you open your trailer door, it bumps into the trailer in front of it!! Whenever a tornado comes thru a trailer park and wipes out half the population of the park, you can bet your sweet hiney, that those lots will have new (I use the word New very loosely) trailers BACK on them in less than a month.

I remember when I was a teen, I used to think, "I can't wait til I grow up and find me a husband. We will buy us some land, and get us a trailer" I must have been VERY poor or miserable..

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